And on a lighter note - Page 51

RDLouks · 08-04-2002, 08:13 AM

Rumor has it that there is a ghost in this picture, some people have reported being able to see the ghost and some have not. Be patient and let us know if you can see the ghost

http://home.attbi.com/~n9ivo/whatswrong.swf]Ghost in the picture[/url]

RDLouks · 08-04-2002, 08:16 AM

Ghost in the picture

DeMenAce · 08-04-2002, 08:31 AM

hey RDLouks,

I think that same this was posted way back near the 1/3 part of this thread! Still gets you though!

Coma

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side...You know what?"
"What dear?" she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.
"I think you're bad luck, why don't you ****** off."

Homerclees · 08-04-2002, 06:57 PM

LOL...DeM!

about the ghost in the picture one, have any of you guys seen the video of some guy sitting front of his computer staring at that picture...then when the ghost flashes....he jumps out of his chair and screams REALLY loud??!!

if i find that video....i'll post it!

garnet_abx · 08-05-2002, 08:22 AM

A Pfizer Inc. spokesperson announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use 'as is' or as a mixer.
Pepsi's proposed ad campaign claims:- "It will now be
possible for men to pour themselves a stiff one."
Obviously, we can no longer call this a 'soft drink'. This additive gives new meaning to the names of highballs, cocktails and just a good old fashioned stiff drink.
Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of
"Mount and Do."

JoeFrat · 08-05-2002, 10:58 AM

LMAO!

DeMenAce · 08-05-2002, 12:17 PM

Obviously, we can no longer call this a 'soft drink'.

Tranced_abx · 08-05-2002, 01:42 PM

PRESIDENT RELEASES COMPLETE LIST OF OFFICIAL NICKNAMES FOR AMERICAN AND WORLD LEADERS
Statement by the President

THE PRESIDENT: Good afternoon. Today, in the interest of desecretizing my trademark approach to political bipartisanship and international diplomacy, I have assembled a comprehensive list of the folksy, affectionate monikers I bestow on those persons of whom my advisors wish me to be aware. They are as follows:

UNITED STATES:

Laura Bush: "Pickles"
Jeb Bush: "Gator"
Dick Cheney: "Mr. Cheney, Sir"
Bill Clinton: "Fat Chick ****er"
Hilly Clinton: "Senator Carpetbaggermuncher"
Ann Coulter: "Gash Limbaugh"
Tom Daschle: "*******"
David Duke: "Brother Sheets"
Ari Fleischer: "Cue Ball"
Barney Frank: "Froot Loop"
Dick Gephardt: "Lady-brows"
NOTE: When together, Gephardt and Frank are known as "Blondie and Fagwood"
Ruth Bader Ginsberg: "Lezzie the 4-Eyes"
Al Gore: "Mr. Poopy-Pants-Loser-Dickhead-Sucker"
Billy Graham: "Grandpa Moses"
Katherine Harris: "Avon Lady"
Dennis Hastert: "Penis Hastahurt"
Charlton Heston: "Grandpa Ramrod"
Karen Hughes: "Butch"
Ted Kennedy: "Life Guard"
Henry Kissinger: "Jewboy Classic"
Kenneth Lay: formerly "Kenny Boy," but now "That guy everyone's yapping about"
Joe Lieberman: "Jewboy 2000"
Rush Limbaugh: "Phen Phen"
Trent Lott: "Dippity-Do"
Mary Matalin: "Houdini"
Ralph Nader: "Jackpot"
Peggy Noonan: "Shakespeare"
Oliver North: "Colonel Mum's-the-Word"
Sandra Day O'Connor: "Sister C-Cup"
Colin Powell: "Boy"
Dan Quayle: "Professor"
Ronald Reagan: "Forget-Me-Not"
William Rehnquist: "Leader of the Pack"
Ralph Reed: "Kid Klinefelter"
Condi Rice: "Tar Baby"
Karl Rove: "Mr. President"
Donald Rumsfeld: "Duke Nukem"
Antonin Scalia: "Pitbull the Dago"
David Souter: "Daddy's Little Traitor"
Jimmy Swaggart: "Motel 6"
Clarence Thomas: "Long Dong Slivva"
Oprah Winfrey: "Chocosaurus"

INTERNATIONAL:
Bertie Ahern: "Potato McDrunky"
Kofi Annan: "Buckwheat"
Yasir Arafat: "Picnic Basket Head"
Tony Blair: "Sissy Pants"
Silvio Berlusconi: "Garlicko"
Jacques Chirac: "Froggy le Poodle"
Jean Chretien: "Governor 51"
Kim Dae-jung: "Dog Breath"
Pablo Escobar: "Candy Man"
Vicente Fox: "Frito Bandito"
Tarja Halonen: "Who?"
Saddam Hussein: "Plan B"
Hamid Karzai: "Pinocchio"
Ayatollah Khamenei: "***-a-hola Cockamamie"
Junichiro Koizumi: "Chopstix"
Aleksander Kwasniewski: "Kaiser Kielbasa"
Hosni Mubarak: "Pharaoh Hos-Mu"
Pervez Musharraf: "The Pervertster"
Pope John Paul II: "Hunchy the Popo"
Vladimir Putin: "Pooty Poot"
Muammar al-Qadhafi: "Momo al-Labia"
Prince Abdullah Saud: "Your Royal Highness Price Abdullah Saud, Sir"
Gerhard Schroeder: "Herr Gestapo"
Ariel Sharon: "Gefilte ****"
Jiang Zemin: "Jiang the Chicken Wiang"

source: http://www.whitehouse.org/news/2002/071702.asp

DeMenAce · 08-05-2002, 09:06 PM

A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
Dear Lord,
I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen
God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man’s wish.

The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman. He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balance the check book. He cleaned the cat’s litter box and bathed the dog.
Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep & mop the kitchen floor. Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home. Set out cookies and milk and got the kids organized to do their homework, then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing.
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper. After supper he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed.
At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren’t finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love which he managed to get through without complaint.

The next morning he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said:
Lord, I don’t know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife’s being able to stay home all day. Please, oh please, let us trade back.
Amen
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied:
My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were. You’ll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night.

Sir Skully · 08-05-2002, 11:11 PM

LoL!

Tranced_abx · 08-06-2002, 12:48 PM

http://www.whitehouse.org/kids/reagangame.html

the big ronald reagan memory

Tranced_abx · 08-06-2002, 05:23 PM

Homerclees · 08-06-2002, 11:35 PM

LOL....it's so true!

Sir Skully · 08-06-2002, 11:53 PM

LoL! I hear that!

DeMenAce · 08-07-2002, 06:09 PM

Secrets to a Happy Marriage from a Male Point of View
1. It is important to find a woman that cooks and cleans.
2. It is important to find a woman that makes good money.
3. It is important to find a woman that likes to have sex.
4. It is important that these three women never meet.

08-04-2002, 08:13 AM	#751
RDLouks !Master of Useless Facts! Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Midland, Michigan Posts: 454	Check this out! Rumor has it that there is a ghost in this picture, some people have reported being able to see the ghost and some have not. Be patient and let us know if you can see the ghost http://home.attbi.com/~n9ivo/whatswrong.swf]Ghost in the picture[/url] __________________ Just Remember, Computers Run On Magic Smoke.................Let The Magic Smoke Out And It Will Quit Running
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08-04-2002, 08:16 AM	#752
RDLouks !Master of Useless Facts! Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Midland, Michigan Posts: 454	Sorry Bout that lets try this again Ghost in the picture __________________ Just Remember, Computers Run On Magic Smoke.................Let The Magic Smoke Out And It Will Quit Running
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08-04-2002, 08:31 AM	#753
DeMenAce GOD is LOVE Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 21,978	hey RDLouks, I think that same this was posted way back near the 1/3 part of this thread! Still gets you though! Coma A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side...You know what?" "What dear?" she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth. "I think you're bad luck, why don't you ****** off." __________________
(Offline)

08-04-2002, 06:57 PM	#754
Homerclees Call me Homer Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 5,029	LOL...DeM! about the ghost in the picture one, have any of you guys seen the video of some guy sitting front of his computer staring at that picture...then when the ghost flashes....he jumps out of his chair and screams REALLY loud??!! if i find that video....i'll post it! __________________ "Statistics can be used to prove anything...40% of people know that!!" -Homer J. Simpson
(Offline)

08-05-2002, 08:22 AM	#755
garnet_abx SEXpert Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Nova Scotia, Canada Posts: 16,182	A NEW PEPSI DRINK A Pfizer Inc. spokesperson announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use 'as is' or as a mixer. Pepsi's proposed ad campaign claims:- "It will now be possible for men to pour themselves a stiff one." Obviously, we can no longer call this a 'soft drink'. This additive gives new meaning to the names of highballs, cocktails and just a good old fashioned stiff drink. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of "Mount and Do." __________________ Abit NF7-S 2500+ mobile 1.86g@2.4g OCZ 3500 EL Dual Channel Memory BFG GeForce 6600 GT OC My Computer Compare - 3DMark 2003; 3DMark2001 Folding will help save lives.........................maybe your own!
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08-05-2002, 10:58 AM	#756
JoeFrat Registered Join Date: Jul 2001 Posts: 3,850	LMAO!
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08-05-2002, 12:17 PM	#757
DeMenAce GOD is LOVE Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 21,978	HaHaHa!!! Obviously, we can no longer call this a 'soft drink'. __________________
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08-05-2002, 01:42 PM	#758
Tranced_abx Who, me? Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: N51°34'01.5" E5°03'54.9" Posts: 1,631	PRESIDENT RELEASES COMPLETE LIST OF OFFICIAL NICKNAMES FOR AMERICAN AND WORLD LEADERS Statement by the President THE PRESIDENT: Good afternoon. Today, in the interest of desecretizing my trademark approach to political bipartisanship and international diplomacy, I have assembled a comprehensive list of the folksy, affectionate monikers I bestow on those persons of whom my advisors wish me to be aware. They are as follows: UNITED STATES: Laura Bush: "Pickles" Jeb Bush: "Gator" Dick Cheney: "Mr. Cheney, Sir" Bill Clinton: "Fat Chick **er" Hilly Clinton: "Senator Carpetbaggermuncher" Ann Coulter: "Gash Limbaugh" Tom Daschle: "***" David Duke: "Brother Sheets" Ari Fleischer: "Cue Ball" Barney Frank: "Froot Loop" Dick Gephardt: "Lady-brows" NOTE: When together, Gephardt and Frank are known as "Blondie and Fagwood" Ruth Bader Ginsberg: "Lezzie the 4-Eyes" Al Gore: "Mr. Poopy-Pants-Loser-Dickhead-Sucker" Billy Graham: "Grandpa Moses" Katherine Harris: "Avon Lady" Dennis Hastert: "Penis Hastahurt" Charlton Heston: "Grandpa Ramrod" Karen Hughes: "Butch" Ted Kennedy: "Life Guard" Henry Kissinger: "Jewboy Classic" Kenneth Lay: formerly "Kenny Boy," but now "That guy everyone's yapping about" Joe Lieberman: "Jewboy 2000" Rush Limbaugh: "Phen Phen" Trent Lott: "Dippity-Do" Mary Matalin: "Houdini" Ralph Nader: "Jackpot" Peggy Noonan: "Shakespeare" Oliver North: "Colonel Mum's-the-Word" Sandra Day O'Connor: "Sister C-Cup" Colin Powell: "Boy" Dan Quayle: "Professor" Ronald Reagan: "Forget-Me-Not" William Rehnquist: "Leader of the Pack" Ralph Reed: "Kid Klinefelter" Condi Rice: "Tar Baby" Karl Rove: "Mr. President" Donald Rumsfeld: "Duke Nukem" Antonin Scalia: "Pitbull the Dago" David Souter: "Daddy's Little Traitor" Jimmy Swaggart: "Motel 6" Clarence Thomas: "Long Dong Slivva" Oprah Winfrey: "Chocosaurus" INTERNATIONAL: Bertie Ahern: "Potato McDrunky" Kofi Annan: "Buckwheat" Yasir Arafat: "Picnic Basket Head" Tony Blair: "Sissy Pants" Silvio Berlusconi: "Garlicko" Jacques Chirac: "Froggy le Poodle" Jean Chretien: "Governor 51" Kim Dae-jung: "Dog Breath" Pablo Escobar: "Candy Man" Vicente Fox: "Frito Bandito" Tarja Halonen: "Who?" Saddam Hussein: "Plan B" Hamid Karzai: "Pinocchio" Ayatollah Khamenei: "-a-hola Cockamamie" Junichiro Koizumi: "Chopstix" Aleksander Kwasniewski: "Kaiser Kielbasa" Hosni Mubarak: "Pharaoh Hos-Mu" Pervez Musharraf: "The Pervertster" Pope John Paul II: "Hunchy the Popo" Vladimir Putin: "Pooty Poot" Muammar al-Qadhafi: "Momo al-Labia" Prince Abdullah Saud: "Your Royal Highness Price Abdullah Saud, Sir" Gerhard Schroeder: "Herr Gestapo" Ariel Sharon: "Gefilte ***" Jiang Zemin: "Jiang the Chicken Wiang" source: http://www.whitehouse.org/news/2002/071702.asp __________________ Laptop: P4 3.2/800 HT 1Gb DDR400 60gb 7200rpm Server: Asus S-Presso P4 2.8/800 HT 512MB DDR400 250GB SATA
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08-05-2002, 09:06 PM	#759
DeMenAce GOD is LOVE Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 21,978	A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed: Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man’s wish. The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman. He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balance the check book. He cleaned the cat’s litter box and bathed the dog. Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep & mop the kitchen floor. Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home. Set out cookies and milk and got the kids organized to do their homework, then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing. At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper. After supper he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed. At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren’t finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love which he managed to get through without complaint. The next morning he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: Lord, I don’t know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife’s being able to stay home all day. Please, oh please, let us trade back. Amen The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were. You’ll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night. __________________
(Offline)

08-05-2002, 11:11 PM	#760
Sir Skully ABX KNIGHT EXEMPLAR Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: USA-GA Posts: 26,214	LoL! __________________ .....................................................................................................................
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08-06-2002, 12:48 PM	#761
Tranced_abx Who, me? Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: N51°34'01.5" E5°03'54.9" Posts: 1,631	http://www.whitehouse.org/kids/reagangame.html the big ronald reagan memory __________________ Laptop: P4 3.2/800 HT 1Gb DDR400 60gb 7200rpm Server: Asus S-Presso P4 2.8/800 HT 512MB DDR400 250GB SATA
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08-06-2002, 05:23 PM	#762
Tranced_abx Who, me? Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: N51°34'01.5" E5°03'54.9" Posts: 1,631	__________________ Laptop: P4 3.2/800 HT 1Gb DDR400 60gb 7200rpm Server: Asus S-Presso P4 2.8/800 HT 512MB DDR400 250GB SATA
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08-06-2002, 11:35 PM	#763
Homerclees Call me Homer Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 5,029	LOL....it's so true! __________________ "Statistics can be used to prove anything...40% of people know that!!" -Homer J. Simpson
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08-06-2002, 11:53 PM	#764
Sir Skully ABX KNIGHT EXEMPLAR Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: USA-GA Posts: 26,214	LoL! I hear that! __________________ .....................................................................................................................
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08-07-2002, 06:09 PM	#765
DeMenAce GOD is LOVE Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 21,978	Secrets to a Happy Marriage from a Male Point of View 1. It is important to find a woman that cooks and cleans. 2. It is important to find a woman that makes good money. 3. It is important to find a woman that likes to have sex. 4. It is important that these three women never meet. __________________
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